21 April 2020

A Tearful Episode

I fell over yesterday, not badly and thank goodness I didn't do any serious damage. I had been watering the hanging baskets at the front of the house and turned round to go back in through the open front door. I think I misjudged the distance to the step and tripped, I vividly remember falling into the lobby, against the door, and onto the floor, and not being able to do anything to stop falling. I bumped the side of my knee and grazed my elbow on the coire matting. It wasn't overly painful and I wasn't bleeding but I cried and cried and couldn't stop, it was real sobbing. I felt old, and when I told my daughter she kindly said "You're not old mum, just older, you need to slow down a bit". She was right because when I thought about it I had walked the dogs, done Joe Wicks 10 minute exercise for seniors and a lot of gardening, the watering of the hanging baskets was an afterthought. I was tired and probably shouldn't have done them. It's not like I have to get everything done by a certain time.

All through the decades I didn't think I would be old, silly really because we all age. But this is the nub of getting older, having to accept that energy diminishes. It's the acceptance bit, that for me, is difficult to come to terms with.

So today I have done some sit down work for my dolls house, a small amount of plant watering, and some reading, and that's it. And when I do go back into the garden I will wear my watch and pace myself.

Be safe and well ~ 
Polly x

26 comments:

  1. I totally get it! As a 60 year old nurse who still works the floor, I hear myself saying "I'm not the girl I use to be" more frequently! But I think we are lucky to have a great hobby and we both read, etc...so many of the girls I work with have social media and that's all. Love your blog!
    Hugs and best wishes for a good day- hope you don't have any residual soreness from your tumble!

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    1. Thank you for your comments Michelle, and for visiting. I thought my leg would be sore today, but it's not too bad, my arm is though.

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  2. Hope you are OK and no serious painful bruising to contend with. It comes as a shock to realise you are not as young and indeed as fit as you once were. It happened to me with a angina attack there is nothing like fear to make you more aware. Stay strong and rest after your ordeal.

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    1. Thank you Lorraine. It is shock and frustration, although as my daughter said it was an accident that could have happened to anyone feeling tired.

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  3. I am glad you are okay. I haven't fallen in a while, but boy does it hurt my pride. Sometimes, a good cry is just the right thing to release built up anxiety and frustration. I hope you feel better and are not too sore.

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    1. Hello Carrie, thank you for visiting. I think you're right about the crying. My leg is ok but my arm is a bit sore.

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  4. I'm so worried I will fall or be injured and it requires a medical visit. I just don't want to go to the hospital. I am so glad you weren't badly hurt, though I suspect sore for a day or two or three. I find lately that I think we all feel so vulnerable these days that it doesn't take much to launch a tear fest. Sometimes for good reason; sometimes I just wake up that way. It probably did you well to release those toxins from your system with the tears. Then do something you love.

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    1. Hello Jeanie, after I picked myself up my first thought was thank goodness nothing was broken because I would not want to go to hospital. I keep busy with lots of lovely hobbies, and keep telling myself that everything will be all right, but I agree that deep down I do feel vulnerable and I think the tears were the build up of that.

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  5. Hello Polly, well my heart went out to you. I so got what you meant. I too am really glad you're okay and, yes, what happened would have been a real shock to your system and, as Jeanie said above, that given what's going on around us, as well as your fall, a good cry would have been just what you needed. Hope you don't bruise up or ache too much but enjoy a slower pace of life, there's lots of things waiting to be seen out in your garden that you may have missed in your busyness.
    I had a fall a few years ago and it caused no end of problems for a couple of years after and am only now starting to get some pep back in my step but I enjoy it for a little bit and then slow down again and go back to a nice slow wander around outside or pick up a paintbrush (instead of the vacuum ;D)). Life is good - on our terms. Big hugs xoxoxo

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    1. Hello Sue, thank you for visiting, and your lovely comments. I'm glad you're finally getting back in step. My leg is fine but my arm is sore. I must learn to sit and enjoy the garden rather than spot the weeding, pruning or tidying that needs doing!

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  6. I FEEL your pain Polly in regard to coming to terms with your body's response to age. It often comes as a surprise to realize that your age in your mind, no longer matches with the age of your body. I want to think that I'm perpetually 40, yet my back reminds me daily that I AM A SENIOR! Ouch and PHOOEY!
    But other than a slightly wounded ego, you are Very fortunate that you escaped a major injury when you fell, Polly. I missed a step on a ladder a number of years ago while working in my garden, and fell (in slow motion) to the ground and landed under a tree! A very strange sensation.
    No doubt crying helped you to release the sudden shock to your system as well as having a WISE, Compassionate and Understanding daughter to talk to- God Bless them! :)


    elizabeth

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    1. Hello Elizabeth, It's a common problem with so many of us, our mental age not matching our physical age. It's always in slow motion isn't it, then finding yourself on the ground thinking "how did that happen?"!!

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  7. I know exactly how you felt, it's not the injury but the indignity that makes the tears come. However when I look at it objectively I realise that I'm a lot more healthy than either of my parents were when they reached this age - having me for a son may have contributed to that - and they both made it into their late 80s.

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    1. Hello John, and the frustration about being so clumsy. It's good to look at these things a different way, I think I'm probably healthier than my mother at my age, and doing more.

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  8. It's so frustrating when something like that occurs. You are busily getting things done and thinking time now for a sit down and a cup of tea, then suddenly walloped. We have all done it, but glad that you did not hurt yourself too badly - we don't want to go anywhere near to an A&E department currently.
    I am now 16 years older than my mother lived to be, and I feel grateful that I have had so much more extra life to enjoy. She never got to see all of her grandchildren or know how lovely they grew up to be.

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    1. Hello Rosemary, I'm grateful to have got this far and must take more care in future. When I checked myself over my first thought was, thank goodness I won't have to go to A&E

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  9. Thank you for sharing this intimate experience with us, Polly. I think that a lot of us can relate so well to having to accept that our abilities just aren't what they used to be. When you're a go getter in life and such a strong woman, realizing that diminishing forces you to reevaluate your worth. Your daughter is wise and so are you for taking her advice. One great thing about getting older is that it is so amazing to see our daughters become strong and fierce in their lives just as we are letting go of some control of ours. I am so glad that you are none worse for the wear and are giving yourself light duty!

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    1. Thank you Jodi. That's such a lovely thing to say about our daughters becoming stronger as we are letting go a bit. My daughter is so strong and sensible and knows just what to say when I need some reassurance or a hug. And my Ozzie daughter would be the same.

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  10. Yes, lucky you didn't do any serious injury. Very wise to have a more relaxing day with less chance of a trip. Personally I'm not conscious of lower energy levels, but then I've always had a rather laid-back lifestyle with plenty of rest breaks and daydreaming! My experience of getting older is mainly a few aches and pains I never had before. Fortunately nothing that impedes my usual daily routines.

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    1. I'm my own worst enemy, if I'm sitting it the garden I will see a weed that needs removing, or something that needs pruning or tidying. However I am now trying very hard to take a leaf from your book and do more daydreaming :-)

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  11. I'm sure the fall released tears built over time and that's a good thing.
    A solid fall can be an awful shock and coire burns! Feel better!

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  12. Sorry to read about your fall, Polly, but so glad to know that aside from the bruises there wasn't any serious harm done. yes, I can understand your crying jag as it happens to all of us, even though many don't admit it. But we are human and our spirits get down sometimes with just a little (or not so little) thing. Aging is not fun and my mother always told me "not to get old" but then the alternative isn't cheerful. you are obviously doing a lot and maybe taking a rest will be a good thing. Hope you are feeling better and enjoy a restful weekend.

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    1. Thank you for your kind words Beatrice. I'm back to my usual self now, and being mindful of what I'm doing and how I'm feeling :-)

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  13. It doesn't really hit us until something like this happens, that we are actually aging, and we're not going to live forever! I had a fall in my house last year: I was chasing the cat and slipped and fell, and only missed hitting my head on the edge of the stove by a centimeter! It really scared me, so I've been a lot more cautious and making sure that I'm not doing anything too impulsively (like running in the house). I'll be 53 this year, but suddenly I'm conscious of how breakable I am!

    Polly, I hope you are feeling better, my dear.

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    1. Hello Sheila, I'm very sorry for the lateness replying. Thank you for your kindness, I recovered very well. You're just a spring chick :-) x

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